AVW Newstime Comedy: Sibs Weekend a disaster because your sibling has rendered you irrelevant

Various sources confirm that Ohio University’s annual “Sibs Weekend” was a complete and total disaster, serving only to remind you that you are not your parents’ favorite child. You thought that maybe your success at college would finally one-up your little sibling, but no, they’re doing just fine without you because your parents always loved them just a little bit more than you.“Mom turned your room into my hangout space,” said one little sib. The little sib in question went on to explain that a “hangout space” is a room for “you know, chilling with friends and whatever, because Mom and Dad really don’t care if I do my homework.” This was followed with an off-the-cuff remark about how your graduation photo is nowhere to be found in the living room.All of this follows a series of failed attempts at winning your parents’ approval over Winter Break. Sources confirm that your 3.6 GPA was deemed “unimpressive” at Thanksgiving with your father insisting that your B in Arab History and Literature shows that “You’re not taking college very seriously.”Casually mentioning to your mother that your little sib tweeted about doing that thing that you got in trouble for during your senior year also appears to have failed, because apparently there are simply no rules in that house anymore. Apparently it is Martial Law in the Bethea household.“College is gonna be so awesome,” said your little sib at the end of the weekend. “I don’t know why you seem so stressed about exams and stuff.”When reminded of how rigorous and difficult college courses can be, your little sib laughed dismissively and said “Didn’t you guys get school off ‘cause someone stole five dollars?”She then texted one of her friends to confirm a Tuesday “girls night,” because school nights are fair game for parties now.UPDATE 9:05 PM: Don’t even try and tell me I’m “Mom’s favorite” Janine, that’s objectively bullshit.