AVW Newstime Comedy: Obama Administration Finds Drone Strikes Against Sandy 'Highly Ineffective'

Between Oct. 29 and 31, the CIA, with approval from President Barack Obama, launched at least 14 separate drone strikes against Hurricane Sandy as the storm ravaged the Eastern seaboard. By all accounts this aggressive military action failed to halt or slow the enemy in the manner that many in the White House and the Pentagon were expecting.The drones used in the operation were launched from Joint Base Langley–Eustis in Newport News, VA and repeatedly fired AGM-114 Hellfire missiles into the hurricane. This firepower was said to be “highly ineffective” as none of the missiles managed to hit any specific target, despite the immense size of the storm. This came as a surprise to most of the drone operators stationed in Nevada.“I can’t say much,” said one CIA official who wishes to remain anonymous due to the sensitive nature of the operation. “All I can tell you is we were totally stunned. Usually this works.”So expected was the success of the mission that Newstime was able to obtain a transcript of the speech that Obama was to make in the East Room of the White House on Wednesday night. The speech opens with “Good evening. Tonight, I can report to the American people and to the world, the United States has conducted an operation that killed Hurricane Sandy, the leader of al Qaeda, and a terrorist who's responsible for the murder of thousands of innocent men, women, and children.” Every reference to the hurricane in question is inserted overtop the crossed off name of Osama Bin Laden.At a speech in Defiance, OH, Romney also latched onto the drone strike, accusing President Obama of “apologizing to the Hurricane.”“I will never apologize to the weather for America’s values,” said Romney. “Particularly our values of less water and more electricity.”